When I was a kid, I played a game called Super Mario Bros. In this game, the objective was to save a princess using carefully timed jumps, a few helpful power-ups, and the occasional warp pipe.

What I remember most about Super Mario Bros is the fire flower. Once you picked that thing up, the rest of the game was a breeze. You could storm through castles without a care in the world, vomiting flames all over helpless opponents all the while. Hell, fighting Bowser at the end of every castle was downgraded from “Oh shit” to “LAWL” if you still had the fire flower on you when you got there.

Of course, now I see how hilariously underpowered Mario was compared to some of his NES compatriots.

Super Mario Crossover is an incredible game from NewGrounds in which you play the original Super Mario Bros, but are able to select from a few of Nintendo’s classic heroes. Link is in there, and so is Samus and the guy from Contra, but I think you will agree that there is really only one choice here: Mega Man.

Playing Super Mario with Mega Man feels a lot like beating up little kids and taking their lunch money. Actually, it feels better than that, because no one is going to arrest you for using a super-charged mega-buster on a Goomba.

Play Super Mario Crossover right now. Do it.

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If you haven’t been following MMO news, you may have missed a minor story a few weeks ago in which Mythic Entertainment suffered a small hiccup with their billing system – causing many players to be billed several times in rapid succession. I say the hiccup was small simply because that is the nature of code and computers, and whatever it was that caused the problem likely was some tiny detail as opposed to a multi-tiered conspiracy to cash in on unwary subscribers.

That being said, the issues this little hiccup created were far more concerning than its origin. Reports of bank accounts cleaned out, overdraft fees stacking up, and general financial chaos swarmed the boards over at Mythic’s customer service forum, and those seem to be the lucky folks. Other users reported more dire consequences: interest hikes thanks to bounced mortgage checks, insurance being cancelled when auto-withdraw was denied, or being stranded with no available balance and an empty tank of gas.

While this clusterfuck certainly stands as a shining example of why you shouldn’t keep all of your money in one place, it can also serve as a case study for how a business regains trust with customers after demolishing their personal lives.

For starters, Mythic jumped on the issue as soon as they realized what was happening. So that’s a hit, in my opinion. They claim that the charges were reversed within 24 hours, so I’m calling that a hit as well. Finally, if your bank decides to be a bunch of dicks (I’m looking at you, Chase) and hold overdraft fees over your head thanks to an issue you had no control over, Mythic (and EA) are offering to pick up the tab.

Beyond all that, one of the “higher-ups” over at Mythic posted this on the company’s official website:

Over the past 15 years we have always strived to do what’s best for our players. We are truly sorry, and want to work to make things right and restore our relationship. We hope you will accept this small token of our appreciation for your continued commitment to our games:

For starters all players will earn 100% bonus experience and renown when killing enemies and monsters for two weeks. As well, during this time we’ll be hard at work designing and implementing a special vendor. This vendor will only accept special tokens that will be sent to the mailbox of players effected by the billing error, using these two tokens each of your characters will be able to receive two of the following items:

• Bottomless Chaos Black Dye
• Bottomless Skull White Dye
• Imperial Griffon Mount (Order)
• Enslaved Manticore Mount (Destruction)
• WAR Tract – earn a free level
• Choose from any of these pets – Order: Imperial Hunting Hound or Dwarf Keg Handler; Destruction: Warlord’s Fell Hound or the Goblin Bar-Back.
• Change your appearance with any of these illusion items: Skaven Skin Cloak (skaven), Kossar’s Helm (bear), or the Signet of the Cursed Company (skeleton)

Please accept this gesture as a step towards rebuilding our relationship. From all of us at Mythic, we thank you for your time, your commitment, and your trust that helps us to make great games year after year.

I think this is pretty spectacular ownership on the part of Mythic, especially considering that whatever happened with their billing was as out of their control (Mythic uses a third-party billing vendor) as it was out of ours. However, there is one thing that does bother me about this offer.

All of the things listed above cost Mythic absolutely nothing. Mounts, pets, in-game items, experience bonuses – this stuff all exists in a purely fictional universe and can only be accessed by customers who have chosen to trust Mythic not to fuck their credit cards up again.

If you decided that playing Warhammer Online wasn’t worth potentially having your bank account emptied thanks to a computer error, you’re receiving exactly zero compensation from Mythic. Sure, they’re paying your overdraft fees, but that basically amounts to them returning your money to the place it should have been to begin with. Besides, the stress of that process is mostly focused on people at the banks.

I suppose if you’re a diehard Warhammer Online fan and you’ve chosen to keep your account open, those in-game things are a fine way to apologize. But what is Mythic doing to salvage its relationship with the customers that have chosen to walk away?

The main question I want to ask here is this: Do you consider in-game items sufficient compensation for real-world fuck-ups? Sound off in the comments.

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Official Nintendo Magazine has delivered a few tiny hints about the upcoming Super Mario Galaxy 2, and though I’m pretty sure I read something about a co-op mode and new screenshots, the only thing I can see is this SWEET EFFING CLOUD SUIT.

Some folks are speculating that it gives Mario the ability to walk on clouds, but seeing as how he’s been doing that for years I think that would be a pretty lame power. Here’s hoping it does something a little more interesting – for instance, if I had a cloud suit, I would use it to rain all over everyone’s parade.

Hit the jump for some screenshots, but visit their site for the full gallery.

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If you haven’t seen this yet, you clearly don’t visit any other website but this one.

Thanks!

Anyway, the video shows what would happen if some classic games invaded what is apparently -the- city to invade, New York.  It is pretty amazing, if you ask me.  Check it out after the jump.

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In the last couple of months, one story has reigned supreme in the world of video game news – the rancorous battle of words and legal hearsay between Activision and former employees of its subsidiary studio, Infinity Ward.  What began as rumors of a hostile-takeover-like ousting of two top employees has escalated into a full-on media blitz of stories involving unpaid royalties, secret trips to other studios, and enough lawyer-speak to write the next three seasons of Law and Order.

As with any public argument involving an incredibly successful piece of creative property, the blogs and ‘news’ sites of the world have been quick to jump in on who they think is in the right.  But the real question here is simple:  How can anyone really be sure?

Here’s what we know:

We know that very important people from Infinity Ward were sent packing by Activision.  We know that these very important people have filed a lawsuit against the behemoth publisher over unpaid royalties, and we also know that the company has fired back with allegations of insubordination such as courting other publishers and holding the development of Modern Warfare hostage over better rates.    We know that EA has swept in and picked up these two ex-IW employees, and that they’ve been given the go-ahead on starting a new studio.  Finally, we know that Infinity Ward is hemorrhaging employees, with four more losses being made public just yesterday.

What we don’t know, however, is how much of this information is 100% accurate.  There also doesn’t seem to be a clear answer on who actually owns the rights to Modern Warfare – some news outlets are calling it Activision’s, some are claiming that while Activision owns Call of Duty, Modern Warfare belongs exclusively to Infinity Ward (and thus, possibly to its former employees).  While all of the name-calling, sneaking around, and royalty paying issues may be brought up in court, the only thing that actually matters is who gets to make more Modern Warfare games.

At the end of the day, there’s no telling what went down between these dudes and Activision, and the legal battle will probably only tell half of the story (how much of your every day interaction with your boss is on paper?).  However, if I had to pick sides on this one, I’d be more than willing to bet that Modern Warfare 3 (and 4, and 5) won’t be coming from EA.

What do you think?  Is Activision a soul-crushing devil?  Did the guys at Infinity Ward over-step their bounds?  Should we all just get back to knifing people and let the suits figure it out?  Sound off in the comments.

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Mythic Entertainment, the company behind Warhammer Online (you know, that other MMO that you’ve heard of), may be in a bit of hot water with its players.  It would appear that a virtual crap-ton of Warhammer subscribers have fallen victim to a billing error in which monthly subscription fees were charged to their credit cards more than once.

Well, a lot more than once.  20-30 times more.  Needless to say, this is causing some major issues with the playerbase.  Subscribers are reporting being charged as much as $500 for one month, and stories are rolling in about overdraft fees and all the other problems that can be caused when you think you have money, but actually don’t.

Mythic is quite obviously working quickly to get it sorted, but for many players the damage is already done.  Here’s the official response, and what to do if you’re finding yourself a few hundred bucks lighter:

We have confirmed with our vendor that players who have been charged multiple times for their subscriptions should start seeing a reversal of charges within 24-36 hours. We anticipate that once the charges have been reversed, any fees that have been incurred should be refunded as well. If after 36 hours, there are still incorrect charges or fees on your account, please follow these instructions:

• Please begin by contacting your financial institution and explain to them that you were incorrectly charged multiple times and, as a result, over drafted.  Most financial institutions will reverse these charges

• If your financial institution is unable to remove these charges, you may contact our billing department by calling 650-628-1001 during our hours of operation, which are 10:00 AM EDT – 10:00 PM EDT, 7 days a week. Please have the phone and fax number of your financial institution ready when you call.

So that’s good news! As long as you don’t need to get groceries, gas, or anything else that costs money in the next two days, you’re all set. Though Mythic may not be directly responsible for this mess, they’re going to have to take some pretty big steps at cleaning it up – simply returning the incorrect charges doesn’t even begin to cover it.

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If you didn’t already have a reason to dislike Justin Bieber (besides the fact that he’s cuter than you), here comes some source information for your first hate-filled forum post.

Thanks to the pop superstar’s appearance on Friday night’s Late Night With Jimmy Fallon (which I’m sure you all watch), Gears of War creator Cliff Bleszinski’s hotly-anticipated announcement of what was pretty much assumed to be GOW3 will have to wait until Monday night.

Well, it would seem so.  Except, of course, for the fact that the 360 Dashboard didn’t get the memo and decided to announce Gears of War 3 anyway, as evidenced by the image above.

Consider it a case study for never considering an appearance on a third-rate talk show a sure thing, and also for never trusting the machines.

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Toby McCasker, the Deputy Entertainment Editor for Australia’s Zoo Weekly, has allegedly been let go from the magazine over issues that arose with Rockstar Games.  While the specifics are unclear, what we do know is that McCasker posted contents of an email he claims was sent by Rockstar, one that demanded its new game, Red Dead Redemption, be treated with a little more respect.

Here’s what he posted:

“This is the biggest game we’ve done since GTA IV, and is already receiving Game of the Year 2010 nominations from specialists all around the world.

Can you please ensure Toby’s article reflects this – he needs to respect the huge achievement he’s writing about here.”

Now, I don’t know if this guy is right or if he’s making shit up, and frankly I don’t really care.  Assuming the whole thing is true, he should still be fired for posting internal communications regardless of their nature – most companies have some sort of non-disclosure agreement or at the very least a code of conduct that outlines this very action as grounds for getting shitcanned.  I would have fired him too.

Secondly, I don’t really see a “demand” for good coverage in that email.  I do see a publisher that wants their game to be presented with some sort of gravitas because of its perceived importance, but asking someone to respect their subject matter isn’t necessarily akin to coercing positive coverage out of them.  Unless there is another part of this mail that reads “Seriously, give us a good review or we’ll get you fired,” I’m calling bullshit on the entire thing.

It’s worth noting that even though this looks like a case of a guy screwing up and looking for a scapegoat, allegations of game developers putting metaphorical thumbscrews to writers and game sites is nothing new.  At the very least this situation provides us with an opportunity to assess a system which I have long perceived as broken.

It makes absolutely no sense that game review sites (which this is not) write reviews about the games they advertise.  If you post a review about Modern Warfare 2 and your site is plastered with ads for the game, how in the hell are gamers supposed to trust that opinion?  Even if you’re not fluffing reviews to please your advertisers and keep the many, many dollars they provide, you are still running the risk of completely discrediting yourself and disenfranchising your readers.

Besides, we all know game reviews are bullshit.  It’s been brought up plenty of times, and the incredible “7 to 10” review scale is more than enough evidence to sink the entire ship.  Game reviews are engineered by their very nature to sell games.  They have been since the dawn of the gaming magazine; after all, the more games people buy, the more they need game magazines.  Why do we act shocked and appalled when we find out that someone who pays someone else an assload of cash to advertise their product is upset when that second someone takes a dump on it?

If your fate is tied to the performance of a game there is absolutely no way you are capable of bringing a neutral review to the table, regardless of your cries of “for the people” objectivity.

Maybe people should just start doing what I do and judge things entirely on personal bias without rhyme, reason, or facts.  Those reviews might not be any more useful or informative, but at least they’d be honest.

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This Infinity Ward thing has definitely been the story to watch over the last month or so, and it looks like it might continue to be the one to watch in the near future.  According to MTV Multiplayer, lead designer Todd Alderman and lead software engineer Francesco Gigliotti have both tendered their resignations and are no longer working with the studio.

There’s no information yet available on why they left, though it’s entirely possible the circumstances of Vince Zampella and Jason West’s departure had something (or everything) to do with it.  If Zampella and West are getting ready to start their own studio like a lot of folks thought they might, it stands to reason they’d reach out to people they have already worked with.

We’ll keep you posted as details roll in.  For now it’s safe to say the future of the Modern Warfare franchise could be in serious doubt.

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Square Enix has dropped the full details on the race and clan combinations that will be available in Final Fantasy XIV, and if you were worried you weren’t going to get a chance to play as a barely-passable furry fantasy you can breathe a sigh of relief and get back to downloading Digimon porn.

Each of the five races has two distinct clans to choose from; the clan you choose will change your character’s appearance and probably some other stuff, but like every other video game site Square’s has way too much Flash and I’m not in the mood to navigate some bullshit convoluted menu system to find everything out.

Check out a bunch of pictures and a bit of back story on the game’s  official website.

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